The Other Side

I’ve been sick for a few days. Before I was sick, I felt like I was going to be sick. When I actually got sick I realized that this was my bodies way of telling me… I need a break.

During my sick leave. I appreciated everything and reflected on everything I needed to get done and what I could actually get done. I’m worried… I’m always worried. The things I need to get done most aren’t easy. I know your saying they aren’t suppose to be easy, but I like easy. Its good. It helps sometimes.

Well I’m rambling as usual. As for easy, it never really is, it just seems that way.

Good Night.

I’m tired of this crap. I feel really pathetic. I’m worried and just fearful. I really hope this passes. I pray to God it does. He knows what I’m talking about.

Oh my Lord. Help me.

I’m so tired of being a bother to people. I feel like that all the time. I’m so tired of being ignored. I honestly have reach the point where I’m just going to stay home a lot more.

Its nice a nice feeling at all. I’m always going around and ask this and that. I’m tired of it. I give up. At least until I get a car of my own. Only then will I lose this feeling.

Well I know I’ll prob end up missing out… BUT I’m really tired! I cannot do it anymore. I know that one day I’ll have a car of my own and then I’ll be better off and I won’t have to bother anyone.

Well continuing with last night’s post. I’m back.

I’m at school early, as per usual. I’m always afraid to get caught in the morning traffic. But its not all that bad because there are some cuties that come here for the morning sessions. Working cuties.

There are two in particular I’d like to jump at any point. But for now I stare and look deeply into there eyes and hope that stare back and smile. But in this place the chance of that happening is very slim, but you never know.

I can’t help but think today will bring something new. I’ve been having a feeling of something coming. I don’t know what it is. I have no hint to what it could be. But I have a feeling.

Well let’s see how today goes. Maybe something GOOD will take place for a change.

I know I’m always saying how I want to write. Sometimes I can’t put the words together. Welll alright I’m lying. I always find a way to put the words down. But I think for once I need to stick with something.

Even if no one is reading these posts. I have no following. I can post these words for me. Maybe one day someone will get to them.They will get to see what I have to offer. Until that day I suppose I’ll be posting for myself. Guess what! That’s okay. I’ve learnt to accept it.

I’ve downloaded back Tumblr for Blackberry and I’m back on my path. When something comes along. I’ll jot it down here and feel better and that’s a promise… I’ll feel like I have someone always there.

Good Night.

Im the kind of guy that usually ends up alone. You know you say to yourself its a new year maybe something special will happen. Someone will just walk up to you and  say “Stop now, meet me in the pouring rain and kiss me on the sidewalk and take away the pain”. Unforunately those sweet possiblites dont happen when you hope for it, they creep up when its least expected. 

Sometimes its like you just want to scream and say hey fate… what the fuck is your problem?! Why are you suddenly allowing all of this to happen. When i’ve finally over come the loneliness and the bullshit, its when you tuck someone neatly into my life. 

But sometimes that theory doesnt happen at all and your going 2 years and no serious possiblities and youve gone from open to possiblites to closed and pathetic. Because most times when you meet someone, its only natural they would be in love with someone else and would have someone waiting on them.

It was enchanted to meet you fate thank you for appearing and not appearing in and out of our lives.